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Learning To Let Go


I held her finger tightly. She slipped away and gave her hand to her teacher.
Something tugged at my heart. I looked at her, neatly dressed in her grey pinafore uniform with the white shirt underneath. White canvas shoes, white socks. Her little lunch box I’d made and packed, with the very best healthiest food. I was always so concerned about my daughter’s health and happiness. I looked at her tiny frame and elfin face. She was walking away.
Wow, I thought. She didn’t cry…
What did I feel? Pride? Emotions? I was musing on my tiny daughter’s newfound independence. No sooner as I was thinking this, that very split second, she half turned around and I saw her face, all puckered up.
Oh no! I hid my face behind my husband, and then seconds (it seemed eons) later, I slowly looked up again.
Oh, where was she? There..there…disappearing into the doorway of her future! My heart skipped a beat!
—–
She was dressed again, this time in red…mesmerizingly beautiful! 
I couldn’t dare look into her eyes, wet with unshed tears. I had put in so much effort to raise her. I’d taught her all my most secret recipes. I let her play around with my kitchen appliances. Gave her a sense of her own independence. And then this day, the one I had both looked forward to and dreaded, was here.
Again I tried to hide behind her daddy. She began walking slowly towards the decked up car.
She bent down. She got in…the car door closed shut…it started moving…
Oh, where was she?  And something tugged my heart, this time hard and heavy. She didn’t cry, I thought thankfully. And in that very moment, she half turned around. Her elfin face with a wry sad smile. Her mehndi-designed hands gently waving goodbye!
Farewell, my baby…I wished her silently. My heart skipped several beats!
Tears frozen…to break loose some other time?
This article is submitted by Sajeda Bano


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